Between the Light and the Darkness: August 2008

Tim awoke in Shirra's bed. He felt good now, safe. Shirra was not there, however, and he was alone. He hoped she would come back soon. He missed her.What an odd dream. He had no idea what the hell Gertie kept rambling about, but when she insulted Shirra, she crossed the line.

And that noisy damn dog. He wanted to kick it, thought about it, but just decided he'd rather come back to Shirra's embrace.His head still throbbed and sometimes he thought he heard voices, but he couldn't make out who the voices belonged to, or what they were saying.

His headache dissipated immediately when Shirra entered the room.

"Ahhh, my handsome man has woken up," she smiled at him.

It gave him a shiver of delight when she spoke to him in such a pleasing way. She looked very beautiful today, in her wine colored velvet underwear. She wore a sexy wrap around her waist that left nothing to the imagination. Every one of her delicious curves was on display. He wanted her all over again and hoped that was the reason for her visit.

She crossed the large room and crawled into the bed beside him."How did you sleep, my pet?"He grabbed her face in his hands and brought his mouth to hers. She emitted a throaty growl and giggled.

"You're insatiable. But, unfortunately, I have to send you back to the confinement cell, now. It's almost time for them to come and get you for a day of work in the field."

"I would rather stay with you, Shirra. I don't like being without you."

Shirra beamed, "I wish you could, but if I don't send you back now you'll be missed. And that would arouse suspicion. We can't have that. But you behave yourself and I'll bring you back soon."

He kissed her again. "Promise?" he asked.

She kissed him back. "Oh, you bet." She pulled herself away with difficulty and stood up.

She bit her fingernail as she scanned his naked body longingly. Then she sighed deeply and turned away from him.

She crossed to the wardrobe, opened it, and took out his clothes, "I brought these for you." She placed them on the bed.

Tim looked at his clothes with disinterest, "I don't want to go back," he pouted.

"Look at me, Tim. I want you to go back and act normal. I'll see you again soon."

With a groan he got up and dressed. She came over to him to give him a kiss goodbye. Tim wrapped his arms around her tightly, not wanting to leave.

"Okay, Tim," Shirra said to as she pulled back from him. "Prepare yourself."

Tim saw only blackness and felt dizzy, disoriented. He closed his eyes and the sensations weren't as strong.

Almost as quick as it had started, it was over. He was back in the confinement cell. He saw what looked like himself lying on the floor. Shirra explained to him that she had made an illusion of him in the cell to fool the guards. As he approached it to get a better look, it disappeared.

He sat down to wait for the guard to get him for his day in the field. His head ached again, and the voices started. He put his head in his hands in an effort to massage the pain away. He was going to go crazy without Shirra. He already missed her terribly and wished he were with her again.

After a couple of agonizing hours alone with himself, Aark opened the door and told him to get up and come out. "No more fighting, eh?" he grunted at Tim as he escorted him into the hall, which seemed startlingly bright compared to the dark cell.

It was morning, and the men were being lined up in their rows for their field work. The plants were coming in nicely, despite the lack of rainfall. Tim wondered how anything managed to grow in such arid conditions.

The hours went by slowly. Tim couldn't get his mind off Shirra. He thought he would go mad being away from her. The sun was hot today, and the heat aggravated his head. He wondered how long it would be before he got to see her again.

After what seemed like forty straight hours of work, the guards called them to a halt and herded them to the washrooms. Then it was to the dining hall for lunch. It suddenly occurred to him that he couldn't remember when he had last eaten. He was really hungry. While he was chewing enthusiastically, he looked around the lunch room.

A few tables away he saw a lovely girl with platinum hair looking at him. His heart skipped a beat and he thought Shirra was here all along. Then he quickly realized that she couldn't be his Shirra. Shirra was someplace else. This girl resembled her, but that was all. In fact, the more he looked at her, the less she resembled Shirra at all.

Sitting next to her was the man he recognized as Jondak. He was looking at the girl with longing in his eyes and touching her hair. She didn't seem to enjoy it a whole lot, but she didn't tell him to stop, either. Oh well. That was her problem. He finished his meal without looking at them further.

After the late day meal was over, the slaves were taken back to their cells. Tim was surprised to see that same girl in his cell. He didn't realize he had a cell mate. He stood just inside the door after it was closed and nodded at her.

She ran over to him and gave him a big hug and kiss, "Oh, Tim. I missed you."

Surprised, Tim pushed her off and said, "Whoa. What are you doing? I don't even know you, lady."

She pulled back and cocked her head at him. "Tim? What's the matter?"

"Nothing's the matter. I see you in the lunch room one time and now you're all over me. It's just kind of weird."

"Tim," she said half laughing, "you can drop the act, now. Look. I'm sorry I got mad at you in the lunchroom a couple of days ago. I know you were just trying to look out for me, and Jondak was being his usual jerk self."

Tim searched his memory. He remembered now a scuffle with Jondak in the lunchroom. That's how he got put in the confinement cell. But he couldn't understand what this girl had to do with it. In fact, he couldn't remember why he had been fighting with Jondak. Oh well. It didn't really matter now.

"Tim...please say something. You're looking at me as if you don't know who I am."

"I don't know who you are," Tim said to the girl.

Her eyes misted over. "What?"

"I said, " he spoke slowly and clearly, as if to a small child, "I don't know who you are."

"Why are you doing this?" she whispered.

"Doing what? Look, lady, I've never seen you before the lunchroom today."

"You're being very cruel, Timothy," she said, her voice starting to rise.

"By the way," he said, "how did you know my name?" When he saw the hurt expression on her face he felt a little guilty. "Well, you know my name, what's yours?"

"I'm Ileeya, you asshole! Is this a common practice where you come from? You tell someone you love them and then forget all about them?"

When she said her name, something came to the surface of Tim's brain for a split second and then retreated before he could grab it. The nagging feeling about forgetting something important came back to him again. 'Ileeya' was the name Gertie had used in his dream. What had she said about her? He tried to remember, but couldn't at the moment.

His head was splitting, again. How would Gertie know about this girl, anyway? Ileeya had just said, 'You tell someone you love them and then forget all about them?' What was she talking about? Confound this headache! He wished it would go away already. It was making it difficult for him to think straight.

Oh great. Now the girl was crying. What was it with some women, anyways? Why couldn't they all be as strong as his Shirra? His heart floated when he thought about her."Look, lady...," Tim started to say.

"Quit calling me that!" she screeched at him. "It's Ileeya!!"

"Okay, okay! I'm sorry, Ileeya, I didn't mean to upset you. But I really don't know you. But if you want to sit and talk then maybe I can get to know you. It's not like I'm going anywhere else for awhile."

"Go straight to hell, Timothy Mitchell!" Ileeya screamed at him and then stormed over to a corner of the cell.

She sagged down to the floor, back against her mattress, crying hysterically.

Tim felt really bad for her. He didn't know who she thought he was, but almost wished he was so she would stop crying. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it without saying anything. You've forgotten. You used to love her. Gertie said in his head. What did that mean? She had been talking about Ileeya. Was this some sort of conspiracy between these two? But conspiracy for what? Ileeya's sobs penetrated the cell. The noise was making his head hurt more. You have to dig deep within yourself and find your memories.

The pain was getting so bad he couldn't see. He grabbed his head and squeezed, trying to alleviate the pain. Find the truth. I know you have it in you. He slumped to the floor, holding his head. It's not too late to fight it. He roared in pain and banged his head against the stone wall. Fight against Shirra's control over you.

"NOOOO!!!!" Tim screamed and broke into a fit of whimpering sobs.

"Tim!" he heard from far away. He didn't know who was calling him. He searched for the source of the voice. Then darkness took him.

Jondak couldn't be happier. He had done very well, and Shirra was pleased. Tim's memory erasure had succeeded and she had the perfect compliant man. He may not truly love her, but he thought he did. And that was good enough for her. If she couldn't have true love, she would create true love. It was too bad Jondak was in the confinement cell for the second day, while Tim was in Shirra's bedchamber. Then he would have had free access to Ileeya. Oh well. This was almost as good. Tim had seen them in the dining hall together today and was totally uninterested. Now he would be able to pursue her without the worry of Tim interfering.

He knew of Shirra's ultimate goal, however, but Jondak didn't really care about that. All he wanted was Ileeya. Shirra could take all her lands and rule them as she saw fit, as long as she mind washed Ileeya and implanted him as her only love. He could live with the fact that she didn't really love him. He would have her as his own personal slave who served only him. He smiled to himself as he stared at cell wall. The time would come soon.

Tim was in his apartment again. There were no breakfast smells coming from the kitchen this time. Bones had not been in his usual spot in Tim's room. In confusion, he shuffled across the room and down the stairs. It was dark, and all the lights were off. He felt the wall for the light switch and flicked it. Nothing happened. The power must be off, he thought.

"Gertie?" he called.

There was no answer. There was barely enough light to see the small dining room table off to the side of the kitchen. Someone was sitting in the shadows. Bones was standing next to her. He gave a soft growl as Tim approached.

"Gertie?" he asked, apprehensively.

"You must be Tim."

"Who are you?" Tim asked.

"I'm Beatrice. Gertie's friend." To the dog she said, "Hush, Bones, it's okay." Bones stopped growling, but didn't take his eyes off Tim. He looked about ready to pounce. Tim was almost afraid to move.

"Where is Gertie?" Tim asked.

"Gertie is dead."

"No...what...what happened?" Tim stammered.

"Heart attack. She was having trouble breathing, her throat suddenly closed up. It had opened back up again but her poor old heart couldn't take it. The doctors did all they could, but she couldn't hold on any longer. She told me you'd be coming. I'm supposed to give you a message."

Tim was numb. He remembered his last dream. He had been so angry and hurt Gertie. He choked her because she had insulted the woman he couldn't do without. He choked her and then threw her against the refrigerator, watching as she slid down to the floor, coughing and gasping for breath. It was his fault. He killed her.

Tears pricked at his eyelids and he felt weak in the knees. He grabbed the dinette chair and plopped himself into it. No. This was just a dream. Gertie was fine. She was back in his apartment...

"Gertie loved you like a grandson, you know. Talked about you all the time. She was so proud of you. It was always Tim this and Tim that." She chuckled. "She told me you had eyes as blue as rich sapphires and were as handsome as they come. I see she was right."

"I don't understand...if this is just a dream, then she should be okay, right? Take me to her."

"You're right, Tim, you don't understand. The last time you saw Gertie, she told you it wasn't too late to fight. Ileeya needs you desperately. You need to get to work, Tim. You have a hard job ahead of you."

"But...Gertie...," Tim started.

"Gertie is dead, Tim. Maybe you killed her, maybe you didn't. It doesn't really matter now as the end result is the same; she's not here to help you any more. Now you better go. Ileeya is waiting and she's worried about you."

The room dimmed and Tim had the sensation of it pulling away from him. He felt like he was floating through space, there was no up or down, no gravity pulling at him.

"Tim!" someone called from far away. He recognized the voice, but he couldn't place it. He knew he wasn't dreaming, knew that he was awake, but for some reason he couldn't find his way back to the voice.

"Tim," the voice said, sobbing now, "please wake up."

Something had happened to Gertie. Something...bad.

He tried furiously to remember but his mind was awash with voices, feelings, words, and disjointed memories. His body broke out into a sweat.He saw faces, from past and present. He saw flashes of things that had happened since he came to this strange place. His body broke into a high fever.

"Tim...," the worried voice said. He couldn't tell where it was coming from. It was all around him, part of him.

His brain felt like it was on fire as the voices continued...You must protect her...Fight it, Timmy...I killed my sister...buried the dagger in her chest up to the hilt...Hello, Tim...He's out to take what's not his to take...Why, Timothy Mitchell...she'll stop at nothing...run along, now, human...such a big strong man...don't forget to bring home a girlfriend...Just for the record, I love you...His body went into convulsions as he struggled to find his path, as he struggled to find the truth...find the truth. I know you have it in you.